Today, online dating has become an integral part of our lives. More people are finding their love through dating apps and websites. However, despite its apparent simplicity, virtual communication has its pitfalls. Many of us make the same mistakes that instantly scare potential matches off. Read on to learn how not to ruin the first impression and avoid common red flags in online communication.
What ruins your chances of a successful online dating experience
Online communication can be destroyed by a poorly chosen word. Here are 12 red flags to watch out for and avoid:
- Lack of personal information in the profile: An empty profile without photos, age, or interests is a significant cause for concern. Someone who has nothing to hide usually shares basic information about themselves openly. The absence of such data may indicate that the person is hiding something: marital status, real age, or appearance.
- An immediate proposal to meet: When someone insists on meeting in person after just a few messages, it should raise a red flag. Such haste may indicate that the person is not genuinely interested in knowing you as an individual or may have hidden motives. Therefore, if you prefer to know someone first and meet later, don’t give in to pressure, and don’t sacrifice your comfort.
- Jealousy right from the first messages: If your chat partner starts controlling who you communicate with or expresses dissatisfaction with your activity on social media early on, it’s a warning sign. Healthy relationships are built on trust, not on control and suspicion.
- A long response to messages: Everyone has work and personal life, but when someone systematically ignores your messages or replies with a significant delay without any explanation, it indicates that they are not interested in communicating with you.
- Constant monologue: If your chat partner constantly shifts the focus to themselves, doesn’t ask questions about your life, and shows no interest in your thoughts, this is a sign that you are expected to play the role of listener in the relationship. Mutual interest and a desire to know each other are the foundations of harmonious relationships.
- Asking for money: One of the most obvious red flags is requests for financial assistance. Whether it’s borrowing money, money for a ticket to meet up with you, or any other situation requiring a transfer of funds, this should be a clear sign to immediately stop communication. Unfortunately, scammers often use dating sites to find trusting victims.
- Avoiding video calls: If a person constantly finds excuses not to communicate via video, it should raise suspicion. Nowadays, a video call is a simple way to make sure you are talking to a real person, not someone using someone else’s photos. If your chat partner flatly refuses to have video chats, it may indicate that they are hiding something or pretending to be someone else.
- Expressing love too quickly: Declaring strong feelings after a few days of communication should raise suspicion rather than joy. Such early declarations are often a manipulation tactic designed to create a false sense of emotional closeness and to exploit you for personal gain. It’s important to take time to truly know someone before trusting such intense expressions of affection.
- Contradictory stories: If your chat partner’s stories contain inconsistencies, it is a reason to be cautious. For example, they may initially say they have never been married, and later mention an ex-wife. Such discrepancies indicate that the person is either lying or communicating with so many people that they get confused in their stories.
- Too personal questions at the beginning of the dating: Questions about income, intimate preferences, or address can indicate dishonest intentions or a lack of understanding of boundaries.
- Avoiding serious topics: If your chat partner constantly evades discussions about life values or plans, it may indicate a lack of serious intentions. A person who is interested in a long-term relationship is usually willing to talk about meaningful aspects of life; this is not the right thing to do at the beginning of a date.
- Disrespect for personal boundaries: Pay attention to how the person responds to your refusals or requests. If they persist in insisting, ignore your “no,” pressure you, or try to make you do things you’re uncomfortable with; this is a clear red flag. Such behaviour indicates a lack of respect and can be a sign of potential manipulation or abuse. Always prioritise your comfort and safety in any interaction.
Therefore, each of us can decide on what to tolerate and what not to. However, if these red flags are present, it is a reason to reconsider the prospects of such communication.
How to make online dating more promising and interesting?
Now, let’s talk about how to make virtual communication more enjoyable. The most important rule for successful online dating is to stay true to oneself. Don’t try to appear like someone you’re not. Sincerity attracts people more than an ideal but fake image. Share your genuine interests, views, and life stories, as this will help you find someone with whom you truly have a lot in common.
Here is another tip: ask open-ended questions and suggest interesting topics for discussion. The conversation shouldn’t be limited to everyday small talk. Talk about movies, books, travels, dreams, and exciting events. Maintain a balance in communication; you don’t need to send messages every minute; however, avoid disappearing for several days.
Use videochats for live communication. Text messaging doesn’t always convey emotions and moods effectively. To know someone better, try online webcam chats, such as Mirami or a great alternative to Mirami.chat — CooMeet.chat. A live conversation in a chat roulette is where you can see facial expressions and hear the other person’s voice, creating a closer connection than months of text messaging. Moreover, many users of random video chats say that live communication helped them overcome awkwardness and move quickly toward genuine friendship or romantic relationships.
In addition, try to come up with creative ways to spend time together online. This could be watching a movie simultaneously, cooking dinner over a video call, taking a virtual city tour, and more. Such unusual “dates” are more memorable than ordinary conversations.
Move on to a real meeting when both of you are ready.
Don’t forget that the main goal of online dating is to meet in real life. No matter how pleasant virtual communication is, it can never fully replace an in-person meeting. When you feel that mutual attraction and trust have developed between you, don’t delay suggesting a meeting. Choose a public place for the first date: a café, a park, etc. At the chosen place, you can comfortably talk and, if necessary, end the meeting easily. We wish you an interesting and promising date!
